This first year as a PhD student has taught me things about myself and how to see life that I never expected. I would be lying if I said I always dreamt about being a scientist or doing or even being slightly related to academia. Most of the time I found myself thinking "I could never do this" or that it is too long "for what?" All these thoughts had me going back and forth as I decided whether to apply and accept the offer, but today I am happy I did. Not for how much scientific knowledge I have gained but for who I have become. So, here I present 5 things I have learned this year that have nothing to do with my thesis topic:
1. Stop looking for an instant reward: Most of my life, I got a reward fairly soon after the effort. Study hard, get an A. Deliver well for a client, feel accomplished. Spend a couple of months working on a scholarship application, and hear back. The milestones in a PhD do not work like that. There is no cutting corners when it comes to learning something, truly understanding it, and producing data that is actually useful for advancing your field. It will take time, and that is the point: that you become an independent thinker, learn, grow, manage uncertainty and frustration, and end up as a different version of the person who started. In a world that keeps pushing us to do everything fast, this has reminded me that good things actually take time. Building friendships with people you would feel comfortable calling at 2 a.m., training for a marathon, becoming truly good at something, or building a life with someone you love won't happen overnight.
2. Quitting: This might sound contradictory, since doing a PhD sounds like the opposite of being a quitter, but hear me out. Quitting an idea you can see is not working is exactly like quitting the things in your life that have no purpose but that you keep anyway. Quit overworking. Quit feeling like you are not smart enough or don't belong. Quit trying to fit in with people you don't really like. Quit doing it all by yourself. And quit necessarily treating a PhD like a 9-to-5. I have seen people say you should, but this is one of the few jobs where you get to decide your own schedule, and I think you should take advantage of that.
3. Keep being curious: If you went to school with me growing up, you probably remember I asked a lot of questions. All the time. Then, at some point, I stopped. Not just asking other people, asking myself too. Now I ask why and how again. Not only why my data does not make sense, but what comes next in my life. Why not stay in academia? Why not run my own start-up? Why not be the person a fund calls before they invest in a technology? I did not know those doors existed. I had seen women in science, of course I had. I just thought it meant one thing, staying in academia, and I never asked whether there was anything else.
4. Forget about comparison: We have been sold this idea that we need to have it all: time, money, love, youth. Doing a PhD can feel like you are stuck. Even when you might feel no progress, think about from when? Maybe just a little perspective will make a difference. Even little steps bring you closer to where you want to be. You might see your friends making more money. If you moved abroad, you might see others spending family weekends. Others might be buying homes, traveling the world, or settling down. Even your peers might be getting published faster than you. So what? This, as everything in life, is about you vs you.
5. Being okay with the uncertainty: Up until this point, I believed there was a correct answer to almost everything. Now I find myself doing research on new ideas, things we don't have the answer for. Even when I think an experiment will go a certain way, I end up getting a different result. I have learned to be okay with not knowing whether things will work out. I still plan, and I still prepare for what might go wrong. If it doesn't work, it will be okay. You troubleshoot, and you move on.
Even though my PhD journey is just starting, I hope this gives you some insight into the changes you might experience as you begin your own grad school path, and the importance of choosing a school that is a good match for you. Being part of the Rice community has surely made a difference in my doctoral experience. Being able to access mentoring, being part of @thrive@Rice and @Fulbright@Rice, having a supporting lab and having opportunities to travel and talk to brilliant and kind people every day has shaped my new thoughts and worldview. If you decide to come to grad school, I can be sure that your thoughts, your world, your skills, and your friendships will grow. You will also discover new things and advance science. For that, I invite you to keep being curious. Why not you next?