Last summer, I signed up for a two-week professional event where I knew absolutely no one. It was a summer school about a topic I’m interested in, hosted by a prestigious institution and with an amazing lineup of instructors. Despite all these positive aspects, the idea of making connections with complete strangers still sounded a bit scary.
Personally, I’ve never felt 100% comfortable with the “introvert” and “extrovert” labels. But I do think that some people are naturally extroverted in most social settings, and I’m certainly not one of them. In my case, I would say that the effectiveness of my social skills varies depending on the environment, and going alone to a professional event felt like being dropped into the deep end of the social pool.
Professional events are full of anxiety-triggering elements for grad students. You’re expected to make a good impression in large groups of peers and to engage with senior scholars who can look intimidating. You aren’t just meeting new people; you’re meeting potential collaborators, future colleagues, and established faculty. There’s pressure to look like you have it all together, even when your confidence is shaky. And, of course, there’s always that fear of giving a bad first impression.
Yet, these events are critical to our professional development, whether we like it or not. Conferences, workshops, and summer schools are where connections happen, and those connections can make a big difference in our academic careers. With that in mind, I want to share some strategies I’ve picked up from my own experience for navigating networking in these situations, even if you’re shy or a bit antisocial. Of course, if you’re naturally extroverted, these probably won’t apply to you (and in that case, I’m not sure why you’re reading this article). Here are ten tips that have helped me survive networking.
1. Let seniors and extroverts guide you: This can be one of the easiest ways to get involved in a group conversation. If you’re lucky enough to attend with your advisor, they will often introduce you to people. If your advisor isn’t there or is busy, find someone who seems extroverted. Extroverts tend to pull others into conversations, which can help you get integrated without having to make the first move yourself.
2. Avoid just following one person: This is the flip side of the previous point. While it’s tempting to follow the first friendly face you encounter, this can limit your networking opportunities. If you stick to the same person, you might miss out on other conversations in which they aren’t involved.
3. Don’t be limited by similarities: It’s easy to gravitate toward people with whom you share things in common, but make sure this doesn’t become a barrier to meeting others. For example, international students easily bond with people from their home country or who speak their native language. While this can be comforting, it’s important to engage with a diverse group to truly expand your professional network.
4. Join smaller groups: It’s easy to feel lost in a sea of people. Instead of trying to break into a big group conversation, look for smaller groups of three or four people. It’s much easier to jump into the chat, and the conversation is usually more relaxed.
5. Have your research pitch ready: Especially if you’re a PhD student, you’re going to be asked about your research. Having a brief, clear summary of your work prepared beforehand will help you feel more confident when the inevitable question comes up. This will help you present your work well and boost your chances of having a good conversation about your topics of interest.
6. Prepare for casual conversations: Not everyone is naturally good at small talk, and some of us tend to freeze up when meeting new people. Before going to the event, think of a few conversation starters or casual topics you can mention. It could be something you’ve discovered in the city where the event is taking place or a funny story about your trip there.
7. Use conference participant lists: If you’re bad with names like me, take advantage of participant lists, email chains, or conference apps. Use them to familiarize yourself with people’s names and affiliations. This can save you from awkward moments when you forget someone’s name or what they do.
8. Don’t skip social events: It’s easy to want to hide away in your room after a long day of conferencing, but social events are often where the best networking happens. Push yourself to attend, especially the first few events, as it’s harder to join in once everyone has already met each other. That said, listen to your limits. You don’t want to burn out, but missing too many events can mean missed opportunities.
9. Stay in touch: Don’t let connections fade after the event. In my experience, phone numbers aren’t the most effective way to stay in touch. I prefer following people on X (Twitter) or LinkedIn, where I can stay updated on their work and continue engaging with them.
10. Recognize your value: It’s easy to feel intimidated, especially when you’re surrounded by more senior people. But remember, everyone was once in your shoes. You belong in those conversations just as much as they do. Affirming your value to yourself will help you feel more confident when engaging with others.
If you're waiting for the punchline: I successfully made it through the summer school and even had a great time! Despite my initial nerves, I met some fantastic people and had a lot of great conversations. I also learned that a good thing about large events is that you get multiple chances to improve and feel more confident with each interaction.
So take it from someone who’s been there: you’ll eventually find your rhythm, and by the end, you might surprise yourself with how many connections you’ve made. After all, everyone is there for the same reason: to connect and learn from each other.
About the author:
Agustin Prinetti is from Buenos Aires, Argentina and is currently a PhD student in Political Science at Rice. He graduated from Universidad Torcuato Di Tella in 2019, where he majored in Political Science and Government. Read more.
Further Reading:
Grad School 101: Making Virtual Conferences work for you
A One-Woman Adventure: I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Ice Cream